Could You Be Showing Love The WRONG Way? The Answer May Surprise You!

What’s your love language?

So what exactly is a love language? Well, love languages are how people prefer to communicate emotionally–they’re how we ‘feel loved’ and how we ‘show love.’ And, don’t be fooled – they are rarely the same!

The (5) Love Languages are as follows:

1) Words of Affirmation: compliments, words of encouragement, poetry, etc

2) Acts of Service: washing the car, doing the laundry/dishes, taking the dry cleaning, etc

3) Gifts: flowers, cards, jewelry, etc

4) Quality Time: making a date night a priority, going for a walk together, out to dinner without the kids (LOL)

5) Physical Touch: hugs, holding hands, kisses, back rubs, etc

Maybe you often ‘feel loved’ when you get compliments or your spouse surprises you by pitching in cleaning the house. But, he might ‘feel loved’ when you give him a kiss and a big bear hug or surprise him with a small gift. And, here’s the tricky part…I tend to ‘show love’ to my husband based on how I FEEL LOVED. YIKES. That’s not necessarily going to work.

For instance, my husband feels loved by physical touch and words of affirmation but because words of affirmation are not how I feel loved, I’m likely to skip that one and offer gifts or acts of service (which is how I receive love). Can you see how that could cause problems when all we’re trying to do is show love? Crazy.

Here’s my challenge for you – should you wish to accept it.

Find quiet time alone with your spouse. Each take out a piece of paper and write down five (or even 10) things that your spouse does for you that makes you feel loved. Then read them aloud – explaining each one. This is so revealing – and fun!

My husband never knew how loved I feel when he makes sure my car has gas in the tank.

So, go ahead – take the plunge. Learn something NEW about your spouse tonight. It might just make this upcoming Valentine’s Day the best one ever!

Watch this adorable video showing all (5) love languages in action. It makes me want to be a better wife!

Not sure what your love language is? Take this quiz and find out!

h/t: 5LoveLanguages

Featured Image Credit: Vimeo